Friday, February 10, 2006

Perfection, Performing or Playing

A friend of mine recently talked about coaching and teaching kids in sports. He said he teaches them first and foremost that it is about having fun -- but he also teaches them skills. And so he tells them:
"Doing something well is fun"
I want to say, on record, that I know this is true.

But I am blogging about this because it was used by God to strike a chord in me; to wake me up to something festering in my heart. See, somehow, to me, that quote above implies that doing something poorly can't be fun. And for me, that means I can't learn anything because while I am learning (and therefore no good at it) it won't be any fun so I won't want to do it. (This, by the way, is why I do not play basketball).

The only sport I've ever had any affinity for is bowling. I started at the ripe old age of 8 or 9, in a Saturday morning instructional league. My parents were bowlers for years and years, and I think I learned from them that it is fun, and social, and challenging. Now, I really like to bowl. I'm no professional, but my average is 179 -- pretty respectable, I think.

When I bowl it is not so much whether my team wins or loses -- it is whether I bowl my average or better -- whether I am steadily improving. And it is about having fun. But when I don't bowl well, it is not fun for me.

In my head, I know God doesn't love me any less when I bowl like crap than He does when I bowl well.

So in my own heart why do I love myself less when I bowl (or do anything else) poorly?

Where does this perfectionistic tendency come from?

I don't know, but I do know it has robbed me of too much joy, and made too many things which should have been fun into work, or worse yet, obligation and drudgery.

I just wanna play.

~ Keith


Anonymous said...

Well, I think you need to take a trip to Disneyland with your little sister! As I mentioned in response to her blog on the subject, I'm 65+ and still don't know how to just have fun!

Can Opener Boy said...

Sounds like a good idea about if you sit up front and take the splash on Splash Mountain? =O)

~ cob

Girl in the Globe said...

Any time you want to go to Disneyland, I'm in!!!!
Having fun is sometimes hard for me too. I don't have to be at Disneyland to do it. Friday night I came home and colored for a while. Sounds weird, but it was fun. =)


JJ said...

Wanna borrow some small children?


Can Opener Boy said...

Sure! When can you drop them by? (We'll watch old Batman reruns!!!!!)

~ cob