Autumn at The Orchard

Autumn is here with its crisp cool mornings and early twilight.

I think of Autumn as a season of nesting and readying for hibernation; of pruning back and storing up. In order to store, one must harvest. Autumn is about bringing in the fruits of the year's labors, to sustain one's family through the winter. Autumn is for gently removing bulbs from the ground and placing them in warm safe pots so they can be replanted and bloom again next spring. Outwardly, autumn seems a dormant time. Inwardly, preparation work teems at the cellular level.

Recently we received our official release paperwork, affiliating The Orchard with the AVC. We'll be applying for our non-profit status in Oregon, and Federal 501(c)(3) status, speaking with potential board members, figuring out by-laws, State & Federal regulations, trademark agreements and liability insurance.

All of this is necessary work, but it is also secondary -- the deep, cellular work of formation is continuing right on schedule. We're not driven onward by goals and agendas and two-year plans. We're drawn forward gently by the Voice of The Master Who speaks to us of purpose and potential; of hearth and home.

Autumn is here with its golden-leaved changes, layered-warmth walkings, and hope-filled ponderings.

~ Keith

Honorable Anniversary

25 years ago today I joined the United States Navy. Can you find me in this picture?19 years ago today, I was handed one of the most important documents ever -- it even says so right at the top!~ Keith

The Discipline of Self-Denial

I've blogged a few times re: my fitness level. Usually I do this after overeating and feeling depressed, or just before I start some new diet or exercise program. Then I feel bad when I don't follow through.

This time I waited until I was done!

For the past 10 weeks, I have been following an interval training program I found online:It has been a very challenging time, but this morning I finished their introductory program:As a graduation present I am going out tonight and buying new running shoes!

The cool thing is, while I have lost weight and do feel better, my motivation was not to lose weight or feel better -- those were really just byproducts.

So why am I doing this? I am doing this because I love Cathy and I want to take care of myself for her sake.

It is also, therefore, an excellent exercise in self-denial and discipline. You see, I don't really like running. I would much rather stay in bed and sleep. But in denying my own desires, and instead intentionally doing something for someone else, I am putting myself in touch with the attitude Jesus has. Maybe my self-denial in this area will help me put others first in my neighborhood, or my workplace, or in other areas of my life as well. That is my hope.

And in looking back at the last 10 weeks, I see I have reached a new level of discipline. When I was in the Navy (25 years ago!), "Boot Camp" was 8 weeks long, and it was the hardest physical activity I'd ever done. The endurance test at the end of the 8th week was running 1.5 miles in 15 minutes or less.

As of today, I have been exercising aerobically for 30+ minutes, first thing in the morning, three times per week, for 10 weeks straight! In fact, for the past 3 weeks, I have run a full 5k every Monday, Wednesday and Friday!

Aside from feeling good physically, I feel good emotionally -- about the ability I apparently do have to become more disciplined. I honestly didn't think I had it in me, and have surprised myself. What has kept me going is my love for Cathy and as I set out on my warm-up walk each time, I reflect on the self-denial aspect and ask God to strengthen me to be more like Jesus. If the past 10 weeks are any indicator, He does answer prayer and He does what He says.

Now -- do you think I am jinxing myself if I tell you that on Monday I plan on going to the next level?~ Keith

Summer Ride

Here is my route from today's ride.

View Larger Map

And as an added bonus, I rolled 15,000 miles -- that's 4,300 miles since I bought her in Nov '06!

~ Keith

Wordle

My blog as a wordle. ht to Jon.

~ Keith

PS -- I love how the words-in-proximity say:

"church sharing love models leadership" and how "ouch" is so close by.

N is Here

~ Keith

Vulnerability Trumps Insecurity

Some time ago, I had reviewed my bogging practices and noticed I had been way too revealing (of my and my wife's private life) in a public setting. I think blogs are a good way to share a bit of one's private life -- but I also think there is a limit. Some stuff just goes in my journal -- other stuff can go on a blog. There is sometimes a fine line between which goes where. This line is determined by each individual blogger. I contemplated my own fine lines in No More Blogging In My Underwear.

This morning I read the following in Celtic Daily Prayer:

It is because of the refusal to be vulnerable that, far too often, instead of enjoying friendship and intimacy with those around us, we find ourselves fencing with each other, using our talents, achievements, and strengths as weapons. To be vulnerable in the true sense does not mean that someone must become a doormat, a weakling, devoid of all pride, going out of his way to let others know all of his faults and weaknesses. Nor is vulnerability to be confused with the idea of 'letting-it-all-hang-out', or any other form of psychological strip-tease. To be vulnerable is to be strong enough to be able to present ourselves without false props, without an artificial display of our credentials. In brief, to be vulnerable is to be strong enough to be honest and tender. Like Jesus, the person who is vulnerable is a person who cares enough to let himself be weak, precisely because he does care.
~ Ronald Rolheiser, The Restless Heart

This was refreshing for me to read and reflect upon.

In the past, I am sad to say, my vulnerability was tied to my insecurity and desire to be liked. I thought perhaps if I was transparent enough people would be impressed by my vulnerability and therefore respect me as a very spiritual person. I wore my vulnerability like a badge of honor for others to see -- in a weirldy ironic (and oxymoronic?) borrowing from Rolheiser's imagery, it was as if I used my ability to be transparent as a weapon for fencing.

In Rolheiser's comment I see a new and better way. Since the time of my previous post mentioned above, I like to think I have begun to emulate this; that I care enough about the person with whom I am sharing that I will actually share the real me. But not in an attempt to prove anything or win any awards. It is not about me being liked by them: it is not about me. It is about the other person being cared about enough by me that I am able to, for their sake, not hide myself.
~ Keith